04 May 2010

Feeling better?

A hazard of posing as a wordsmith is that one is invited to lectures and cultural exchanges and expected to comment socio-linguistically.

Here is a recent attempt at humour - fortunately by a woman of beauty, making it easier to rustle up a Gordon gorgon smile.

On the differences between the speech-making habits of different nations:

  • Germans will speak soulfully of Kant and Beethoven

  • Americans colloquially of space and territory

  • Norwegians poetically of mountains and fish

  • Russians proudly of industry and sport

  • British will speak only about the weather, and then to condemn it.

    She had more:

  • What women of different nations are meant to say after love-making:

  • Frenchwoman ~ 'What, finished so soon?'

  • Scandinavian ~ 'My sadness has almost gone away'

  • American ~ 'Great, what did you say your name was?'

  • Russian ~ 'You have made a great contribution'

  • German ~ 'Okay, now let's eat'

  • Englishwoman ~ 'Feeling better, darling?'
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