SCERRIE

Oh good god, I'd've freaked in my Pampers if I'd turned on the tele and found myself ogling this.

Perfectly charming young lady, I'm sure, altho' they could have used a clip that didnt also make her look as if she fields a speech defect.

Nice plain face, nothing to get the dads wanked up over; fills her bra if not her bras [but at that age, I wouldna been focusing on cup size] ... but I would NOT have been able to tear my eyes from the tapering limb.

Of course it's for political correctness - idiots - the same way we get other damaged goods plonked before us on the box - harelips, slight wonkiness with the vowels (and I'm not talking regional accents), over-sized cartoon features that would never have got past HR except for the end-of-month quota for jacking on board those born under sunnier skies.

And now they think we're ready for Ms Burnell. Well, it's not *us*, is it? We've been brainwashed and correctified to look away. It's the kids who're doing the Emperor's Wrist thing and damn right it's putting them off their tiffin.