JON VENIAL

~ filmed in shadow ~

Pray God some misguided twerp lets the panoramic Venables interview go ahead. As much shadow as he likes, voice coder, wah wah distortion ... anything to lure him into the studio and a false sense of security and injustice.

The ratings!

All it needs then is that they place the CCTV cameras absolutely everywhere. Can you imagine the bounty on that murderers head? Neasden Ninjas betting the Swiss Cottage Samurai they'll get to him and out again ... oh poh poh, such fun.

The flash of an arrow (as per that James Bond where the chick takes out her dad's killer just as he dives into the pool, thus perserving the perfect dive), the whisper of a kris, the distant thwock of a snipers rifle.

The Youtube clip would be a sell-out.

STOP PRESS - the Bulgerator denied parole. Drat foiled, curses, twiddle Terry Thomas 'tache.

Cute li'l thang, yon Bumables. No doubt, now a nasty pimply shaggard has-been, but back when his pert ass was first chucked inna clanger, fo' sho them bulls made sure he dropped the Camay in the shower. One likes to think so.

OK, so no parole; back to the drawing board. Softlee softlee thwackee monkey (to use prison parlance).

Huge Trophy ~ don't you love that butch prison polari? 'Trophy', indeed. Ooh, I can just imagine those lags straining thru the bars for a squint and a squeeze. But how wonderful he lives under those conditions and that them in the In are as keen to tear him to pieces as we outside. One day ... just one slip.