BULGER BASHER BAILED BORDERING BABES

Or, since the whole point of the exercise is to posse down this blighter, get the Venables name up and out there ... calling all search engines ... 

• Venables 
• Venables 
• Venal Balls 
• VENABLES
• ... as in Thompson
• ... as in Jimmy Bulger.

How I wish I was on the headline team ~ some subs get all the luck.

BULGER BIFFER BILLETED BORDERING BABES. 

Really get them northern mums going.

Tricky finding good 'V' words to alliterate: Vile Venables venue'd verge of nippers.  

WANTED: Jon Venables 

Back story ~ "Venables and friend Robert Thompson, both ten at the time, were jailed for eight years for sadistically killing toddler Jamie, two, in 1993.

The toddler was abducted from a shopping centre in Bootle and subjected to a horrific attack near a railway line that shocked the nation. Venable is out again, believed re-housed 'somewhere in the north of England'." 

By the Sleuthings of SLORC  !! Surely in God's name of All that's Vengeful, we can trace and trash him now ?? 

(Incidentally, dont you love the initials SLORC for Burma's State Law and Order Restoration Council ?? Just like Fleming's SMERSH except he wanted it to sound sinister whereas I'm sure the Burmese goons thought they were coming up with something peaceful and reconciliatory.)

I'll wager a few stout Slorcists and true, let loose on the mean streets of 'north of England' wi' pliers and blow-torch would run the bastard down and have him turning on the spit before we could say Miley Cyrus. So what the devil is wrong with our toothless Netizenry? 

I've long lost my temper but now I'm beginning to lose hope, except of course I haven't: in the week of Fifth Estate, I'm encouraged to think that one - just one -  right- and forward-thinking guerilla Googler will emerge from the sludgy slothful ranks to drop just a tiny bone that'll point the hounds baying in the right direction. Oh happy day!

It's not all gloom - they're out there. This clip was sent to me by one of the faceless faithful and I know there're more.

I love the idea of Venables, crazed by proximity to these children, suddenly turning into a raving kid killah. Listen, he's a sick hunted frightened bizarro whose fourth identity is now so enmeshed with the others that he'll blow his cover just blowing his nose.

I don't think they'll catch him wanking behind the porn rack in some northern WH Smith but I would love it if it turned into some Stephen King scenario where he's pressing his nose against the playground fencing of Greenhalgh Junior and one of the darlings shouts "Ayup! There's our Jon, no mistake - quick, lads, let's tear his bollocks off!" ~ which they will manage with bags more aplomb and glee than my useless Corfucian Irregulars (sorry, chaps, had to be said) who've come up with bugger all in nabbing and slabbing fugitive JV.

I lie awake at night pondering the syringe in the haystack of missed clues out there pointing to Venner's venue. Someone out there must be this close ... oh boy, what a hoe-down there'll be when we've chased old VarletBalls down.

Great movie, it'll make: Venables rumbled, he'll make for a patch of wooded country he marked out during Identity 2 when he was familiarising himself with some rough terrain to lead the Filth a merry chase.

Won't help tho' - they'll send that robot horse after him. Hi yo, Silver. Can't you picture it, relentlessly trotting in the pale moon light.  

I want to be there on camera 2 and I want to be there again when the Lords of the Flies catch up and rent the venerable Venables flies medi-evily asunder.