ROBIN HOOD

Grauniad movie mauler Anna Packard packs my kind of review. I have to see it.

Quoth Teleg: "Sienna Miller was originally cast as Maid Marian, but she left the film for undisclosed reasons and was replaced by Cate Blanchett.

"The script has undergone several rewrites, and an initial plan to cast the Sheriff of Nottingham as the hero and Robin as a morally ambiguous vigilante were dropped."

He's back ... and he's pissed off

(in a noble, gladiatorial kind of way)

If Cate Blanchard can be 'persuaded' to appear, I can be conned into going to see it.

It's my kind of trailer

Macho horsemen

Much implied violence (incl what looks like the fragrant Cate being shoved around - ooh!)

Arrow leaving bow in slow mo'

Padding wolf in moonlight past daid bodies

Grim looks and manly roars

Read the review - Packard packs it in.

In fact, I keep wanting to quote AP, such as about,

"A trailer that feels remarkably like it's trying to promise the audience Gladiator 2: The Medieval Years 

(tagline – in rumbling baritone – 'He's changed his name … but otherwise it's basically the same.')"

Rumbling baritone, indeed. Some of these reviewistas, too fluent for their own keyboard.

Sherwood Goons ~ A soothsayer, forsooth.

PRIMAL COMMENT

[Badass excelling and extending himself. The Boy needs a Life.

May try to pass this essay orf as my own, certainly add every possible link and floosy foto.]

"I fear Ridley may have missed the primal elements of the RH legend as they have evolved over centuries - even as the trailer lays claim to 'the legend'.

With Gladiator it didn't matter as there's no primal story, but Robin Hood is the best known of all English folk heroes, his tale and his companions surprisingly well known.

The Welsh have Twm Siôn Cati'; the Scots Rob Roy. We have Hereward the Wake, but especially Robin.

The key elements include the aristocrat reluctantly turned outlaw mixing with peasants including that magic cross-section of Englishmen he gradually recruits to his band - proving he can do stuff with bow, fists and quarterstaff and finding his way around the secret almost impenetrable and protective Sherwood Forest.

Next is indeed the long bow - a weapon of special significance for the English (origin of our V-sign).

Next is the colour green, especially the greenwood, hiding from Normans who cut down trees and don't use bows.

I worry about those beach scenes, swords and brown clothes and the sexiness of Cate in the trailer.

[Don't. The sex is fine, just fine. Cue 'nuther shot of CB, lads ... ah, now I see where SB's coming from. Good lad - Ed]

Next bit of the core myth is a group of chaps being ever so slightly mothered by a jolly super gel - Maid Marion [sic, altho' I thought that was John Wayne's name and MM spelled it Marian; no matter].

It's a celibate relationship.

Then there's the proximity: All happens in and around Nottingham with outlaws being able to go to and fro mingling with the locals, with Marian moving discreetly between the sheriff's court and the greenwood whose paths she knows as well as the outlaws.

Speaking of 'celibate', Badass reveals his true colours by beating me at my own game of peppering posts with the boilingest of CHICKS CHAUDES.

From his cache under the longjohns, away from the censorious peek of Mrs B, cop yer whack of the calibre of Notts Nut Gnashers the Sheriff was fielding in those days (boo! hiss!)

A'riighht! Dig that Loxley Bleu.

Phwoahsooth ain't in it.

(Thanks Badass)

Finally, there's giving the takings to the poor and collecting ransom money for the real king versus King John and the nasty Sheriff of Nottingham (e.g they're not really outlaws but loyal to the true king.)

Many of these parts of the legend are contested (e.g Robin really comes from Loxley in Yorkshire, and was a yeoman and not especially loyal to any King), but this is how the legend has evolved.

Going back to something 'more authentic' is as risky as messing with current understandings of the Nativity or Father Christmas.

Scott deviates from the present legend at his peril. Let's see."

Mudblood! But this has to be the promptest longest Comment received at the Pagoda since commenting began.

Bravo, Badass, and I shall be returning to link and 'lustrate further.