SHOOTIST BLUES

Went down to Corfu Central
Find me a shiny gun
You know that square on Theotoki
Decided to buy me a gun
All the garden crap and yappety blah yap
Fucking four years, seven months 'n' 14 days to git me one

[Fie on your procrastinating ways!]

Looked inside the Hobby Shop
All I wanted was a gun
That's my kind of 'Hobby' shop
Peddling my kind of gun:
Razor too messy, gassing too groggy
Jumping splats the sidework when you've got down

[Look bad on the gravestone, know what I mean?]

Got talking to the gunshop gal
What she had in her barrel of fun'
Chatted up that gunshop gal
What she had, Blam-And-It's-Done
She took me to the backroom
Holster-wear guaranteed to stop or stun

[I didn't need no holster but the bazookas she was packing, I played right along.]

She asked what kind of ammo
Rifled, ribbed, or smooth as a baby's bum?
She showed me her tray of ammo
Told her I didn't need but one
A gob-stopping muzzle nuzzler,
Get my Personal Business done.